We can’t know God’s complete plan for us.

It’s a trial and error sort of thing for me. I know God is not  going to just drop in my lap what he wants me to do. I do know that one part of his passion and love for me is being fulfilled. I can’t stay in the blame game for myself to why things happen the way they do. I can only move forward with what this day will bring. I trust him. I wish I still had the job I had. I could have still had it. I just could not take the presumptions about me from others (unbelievers) I should have been able to stand fast take my lumps and continue because I loved what I did. I just really believe that people can truly misinterpret and  will hurt you and they don’t even know you. They judge. They don’t know I have P.T.S.D and bipolar1. If they had I hope they would have backed off. All I was trying to do was calm my girly girly as I always can and have. Instead because of the shame I quit. The shame of it all on my record for a year.

All I know is that his hand is holding mine. He feels my pain. His pain and suffering I can never even come close to. He died for us sinful lost people. He chose who he wanted to know him personally and through him we know the Father,  (Abba). How comforting that is? His Holy Spirit is in me. It is okay for me to still break and cry and feel lost. After all the trials we go through make us cling to him all the more.

Today is a new day. I just finished my group therapy. It always helps. I believe this form of therapy is the best for me. I complained (grumbled) a while back about it. I do need it. It is other beautiful ladies with their own trying times us helping each other.

I do have a job interview today for part-time position. I realized with my illness I can’t work full-time. Besides it takes away from my volunteer work. I will not have that happen. So the Lord as always has me lean on him. He is sovereign over my life in all this life here and forever.

I am A born again creature in Jesus Christ, growing in his spirit daily.

Trust him, he is always there. Through the bad and good. I know it, you know but, sometimes we want to get lost in the pain AGAIN.

We SEE Rumors of war, war and great disasters.

As born again Christians we know the things happening are what the Lord Jesus said in the Gospels. Don’t let your heart be troubled. These things will happen and then the end will come. Do not trust in this world, be not of this world because this world will fade away.

If you have never read the Bible you should. How can anyone look around this universe and believe it just evolved? God is perfect and created a perfect universe. Then Adam and Eve through the deception of satan fell from God’s Grace. We have that grace freely given to us to embrace. Jesus says he will by no means close the door to those who will come to him. Can you come or can you wait until you see worse? People around me just poo hoo what is happening. Because of our eyes being opened by the Lord we know these are indications for what is to come. We do not and no one knows when the end will come. I only see the true picture of what is happening because his mercy upon me and other born again Christians. God’s wrath will come on this world. God says so in His Word. You can believe now or see what happens to those who do not and be on the wide road to destruction. I am striving to enter the narrow gate. What about you are you doing the Lord’s work or your own?

New Testament, Mark Chapter 13

I am still a sinner!

My nephew is struggling as a new Christian. He has disabilities as I do. I have spoken about him before. He is having a very hard time in school right now in fact he is feeling he can’t do it. I have done that all my life with the jobs I have gotten. It’s like once you apply yourself and get in your head you can do it you do. I didn’t know the Lord then so he has an advantage. Maybe he will find out God has other plans for him. Some in my family think he can’t do it. Well we do know all is possible with God. So he was given through my brother and I, Words from the Lord. To pray in faith and to trust and if it is his plan, you will get what you pray for. I for one did not do well in math. I did not care though. I just wanted out of high school where I wanted to be a wallflower inside the wall. That is a true story in my blog already somewhere. We will continue to pray for him.

He also has this ongoing doubt as a new Christian about sin. The more he does it, the more he is convicted, but of course he cannot be sin free. Oh, but don’t we all know about that. I have tried to tell him The Blood of Christ has covered our sins. That as life goes on until the end we will not be without sin. Who doesn’t feel guilty, a sinner convicted, (his Aunt), the gossip? The more I try to stay out the more I get drawn in. It’s like a plague that eats through me along with losing myself with my triggers in my bipolar mess. It’s what the deceiver can use to war against us. Those things he knows are our weaknesses.

This is what I had lately. All staff are grumbling about a new assistant manager. I tried to stay out of it. Everyone was complaining to me and in front of me. I said many times go to the manager. I tried very hard to stay out of it. Well now I feel guilty because I did go to the manager. I just could not take it anymore. Well things will change, she is going to have too. Now Lord let my mouth stay silent about what is now taken care of. I just had to write a letter to my boss about what was going on and others did also. I have no problem working with anyone. I am there for the Lord. I love my ladies and would do anything for them. That is my gift from the Lord. I am not here to think about who does more on the shift. If they don’t I do it. I work for the Lord who cares what others do. They will have to answer later. The whole of it is we get drawn into a fallen world and it is the tempter who draws us to sin. I have sinned again and telling anyone is just an example, not more gossip.

We have to stay here until he comes and don’t we long for home (Matthew West Album). I love Christian music. One of my favorites on his album is Broken Girl but, they are all good and right to the heart as other Christian singers take us. So everyday pray, everyday read the Word, everyday trust him for in him all is possible. Oh, Lord, come quickly!!!

I am following two of the Lord’s amazing families of missionaries.

I was captivated by what they have done in the Lord. It is nothing for themselves. It is all for him. The Pierces spent 28 years in Ghana building and growing the church of the Lord. A local young converted christian gentleman went to missionary school and became the pastor. When all the Lord had them do was complete they came back. Now through their beliefs, they are going to Brazil with the same mission. We know that their mission will not be easy. Lord we pray that you will give them the support they need. In your name Jesus we pray. Read their story. If you decide to support you can go through paypal and designate to the Pierces mission.



Also truly inspiring are the Eversons.  Brother Ben, is an amazing singer and artist for the Lord. He is learning spanish so that he is able to reach the people in their own language. In fact, he has a gentleman that will teach him spanish if he teaches him music ministry. I have not met his wife yet, but she sings also. At the time of his visit to our church, his family was coming back from Mexico. We all know Mexico is a very dangerous country. They will still be going back soon also. Support and prayers are needed for their mission also. Ben has several wonderful cd’s praising the Lord available. So you may support many ways.


God Bless us All in all our missions. Because we all have our own!




Ever want to scream your way out of a dream?

I know that happened to me last night. I am not sure what made me want to scream now. I know that I tried. It was a conglomerate of things that happened in my life, but they happened a bit different. I was arrested for accidentally going on government property (no never happened). A friend got arrested with me. We were being sent to Florida from where I don’t know. Other people arrived we had to switch vans or planes. I am not sure which. It ended up too many people for a van. I knew I would be gone a long time. Really I just made a mistake and made a wrong turn. A couple of celebrities, were speaking to us offenders. They were previous law offenders with testimonies. Among us were three prostitutes. One friend I know with palsy who wanted to lose weight. It was very weird. I do have very weird dreams. I have all my life…

I was afraid but, I woke up saying, wow just a dream. I wonder if I did scream. It seemed like I did. Well I am glad to have the grace (mercy) of My Lord God and Savior Jesus Christ on my life, soul. I give him all my Heart, Soul and Strength and Love. Matthew 22:37 I thought if that really happened I would stop eating. I would stop taking my meds (show them what bipolar mania is really like). Just be totally uncooperative. It wouldn’t work though, they can inject drugs and IV me. So I would be cooperative. Lord, come quickly. I am waiting in this place I don’t belong. I pray this doesn’t happen but could it? Yes, anything can happen in the realm of the liar, the murder. John 8:42-59 You cannot serve both God and Mammon. Matthew 6:24 Which is it, choice now. Later maybe?


Sometimes Christian brothers say what you need at the right time.


by ancientcures



 A Question Worth Pondering

Thus says the LORD, the King of Israel, and his redeemer, the LORD of HOSTS: “I AM the first and the last; besides ME there is no GOD.”  Isaiah 45:6



Have you ever asked yourself the question: If the world and its way of thinking are so good, then why does it persecute those who are Christians, and Jews?  If America is going in the right direction then why are they so bent of getting rid of the Only True GOD?

Those who are trying to get GOD and HIS teachings out of the marketplace, are of their father, the devil.  Mankind’s way is the way of death, GOD’s way is the way of life.  GOD promotes love and all the religions of the world promote death and self.  Stands to reason if the world is running towards death and destruction, the only sure cure is to run the other way.  There are two religious ways in the world today that run towards life and one came out of the other. 

Jesus was a Jew, HE was born of a woman into the Jewish culture.  HE came to give the Jews the fulfillment of the Law that they cherished and tried to live by.  The problem is that No One Can Live By the Law, except that they are indwelled by the HOLY SPIRIT.  Even with the indwelling of the SPIRIT we have trouble.

The world is evil and wants the light that GOD sheds on it to be extinguished, so they, who are driven by the devil, do all they can to put that light out.  The children of the darkness want to live in darkness so that their sin and decadence can’t be seen.  They stand up every day to push us farther and farther into the darkness that they live in.  Case in point.  The ACLU, who says that they are all about rights, systematically file suit against any mention of GOD in our schools and government.  They say that they are protecting our constitution from those bad folks who are trying to promote one religion.  I believe that you can see the harm they have done. 

ALL the religions of the world are false, whether it’s Hindu, Islam, Shin Taoism, or any other that lifts up self and or and finding one’s inner self or promotes a false god as the only true god.  The GOD of Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob is the ONLY TRUE GOD.  Besides HIM there is no other.  This is why the world does not turn to HIM.  They know that HE exists and that HE has rules and that HE is strict and narrow, being that HE has provided ONE Way to heaven, through HIS Son Jesus Christ. 

I’ve always been one who doesn’t do what everyone else is doing, I’ve tried to be an individual.  I don’t do drugs because it is the In thing, I don’t follow the way the world operates because to my way of thinking, if everyone is doing something, it isn’t necessarily the right way to go.  Why not stop and check out what is really happening in this world today?  I know that folks don’t want to think about this, and many say that it is not positive to think about these things.  I would say that if you see a bridge out it’s best to stop before you plunge into whatever is below that bridge. We may not be able to stop the world from plunging over the edge, but we can, at least, individually stop from falling to our death and destruction.  Who knows maybe if enough of us individuals stop pretty soon there will be a majority?

The Muslims kill you if you don’t believe their way, the Hindus have their cast system and can never get to the place they want to go.  GOD has one thought, that HE loves you.  HE says turn to me, or Don’t.  It is your choice.  HE loves you enough to allow you to make the choice and doesn’t say you have to.  HE loves you enough and respects your Will enough to not force you into something You don’t want to do.  That’s what love is.  It’s is having the power to keep something but letting the thing decide if it wants to be kept.

If the other gods of this world are so good, then why do those who follow them have to force people to do what they say?  Why don’t they take a moratorium on force and let their god enforce itself and it’s rules?  The reason is because they can’t, because they are not gods but figments of some person’s imagination.  Elijah proved that several thousand years ago, when there was a contest between Baal and the ONLY LIVING GOD.  Only the MOST HIGH GOD, can show up because HE is real and not an imagined deity.

Selah, pause and think about what has been said.  Take a break from the world’s way of thinking a ask GOD to reveal HIMSELF to you.  You know what?  HE will.  And you will know it is HE because he never goes against HIS Word, or the Bible.  GOD has put HIS Word above HIMSELF and it doesn’t change because HE doesn’t change, even if there are those who try to change it.  Don’t believe it when someone stands up and says that they are a new apostle of GOD and that they have new revelation.  GOD has given HIS Word and while HE will help us to understand what HE has already given, HE isn’t handing out a new word.  Heck we can’t even comprehend all the HE has given in what HE has given.

Oh, by the way, if you are a believer in some other god, don’t bother trying to kill me. Why not let the one you follow do that?  It might save you from getting into trouble with the law.

Until next time, thanks for looking.  al


Thanks for this amazing post!!! I felt the ire of others this week when I pointed out a few things. You are right and my born again Christian brother tried to tell me. You and I are not going to get them to see. I went into my protection mode with my bipolar and PTSD disorders. My other brother who has worked in the field of mental illness, his whole career at least got them to understand what happened. It was a mix of put down for another person and bringing up something that happened over 20 yrs ago. My dad died Friday, March sixteenth. My mother did not any rehashing of this. I felt isolated after what I said. It was what I felt in leaving my family in Lebanon. No one wanted to listen to me. I pray someday the Lord calls them all. Thank you God for not giving more than I can handle. He works through me without words, sometimes better. Amen. Lord Jesus.

Reading the truth daily always declares the way to the Lord our God.

Why am I surprised? Warning you may not want to read this if you are devout catholic.

I thought I was dealing well. I really was until, I had a trigger for my illness activated. It just got me so protective of my mom. I am a born again Christian and I did not like the subject being addressed. My dad has just died on friday. A certain person came over and brought up something very hurtful from the past. It did not need to be in our lives at this time or ever again for that matter. It made a rift in the family that is now not bridged for over twelve years. It was a very hurtful time for my mother and I did not want her thinking of this and burying her husband she had just lost. Needless to say I confronted and no one liked it. I felt alienated for being a Christian and being assertive. Mostly that because of being a Christian (I haven’t been preaching here for a while). I don’t have the right to say stop it. I was saying also to myself how do you have the right to condemn this person for what you know they did. It is not your right but, God’s only. God says take the plank out of your own eye first. There are many of us around that do think we are better than others. We must repent and be forgiven. Remember it says in the Bible, how he sees us before we are saved. Before that we have no fear of him. Romans 2:9-18.  If repent we have eternal life in heaven if we don’t we still have eternal life and it’s not pretty. If we believe with all our hearts, all our souls and all our strength in our Lord Jesus Christ and his atonement for our sins. We must let him change us to the person with the gifts he is giving us. We are to be a disciple of his word and at any given chance. Even as I had a P.T.S.D. and bipolar day. I stood up for my Lord and Savior. I know he forgives me for things I said. Everyone one of us has their own way of dealing. Mine is along with mental illness. I won’t go into that room for the family private viewing, I can’t deal. Update, I am going, so I don’t regret not being there. God will never give me more than I can handle. My  family understands. I will see him at the funeral anyway.

 I am reading Revelations 21 in partiality. The priest won’t allow me to read verse eight. They don’t want people to know they are sinners. Should I do it anyway? I say yes but, I won’t. It won’t make a difference to those devout catholics who won’t see. Besides I have to follow the priests instructions. He is in control of the service. My parents have supported this church, and my mom’s parents before them. We still have no right to be peculiar people with our born again Christian beliefs. Gee doesn’t that happen almost everywhere now?

Anyway I thought yesterday, “I can’t even go in there for the funeral.” I know the Lord is with me to carry me, so I will be fine. I need to stop thinking forward to the time when my mother may go and I will be her rock through Jesus. Because at this point she doesn’t see and all except my brother, aunt and me do not. No catholic communion for us either.  

Lord Jesus give us Strength in your Love and Forgiveness, and perseverance..

I was thinking before I hope my new name in heaven is Cheer. Probably not of the blue I got that as my email name, Cheercher years ago. Inspired by my outward long call to the saving grace through faith in the Lord Jesus Christ. Saved at fifty-four is saved, only He knows when and if He lets you see.