God, Jesus through the Holy Spirit has always spoken to our minds and hearts…

That’s you with a conscience of free will, you must have. And also you have a knowledge there is only one God, The God of the Bible… Only God is sovereign. He chose from eternity past… He knew you. He overcame this world of evil for us.

When Jesus sent out His apostles He gave His instructions and they did preach the kingdom of heaven is at hand, healed the sick, cleansed lepers, raised the dead, and cast out demons. (Luke 9:2) And whoever will not receive you nor hear your words, when you depart from that house or city, shake off the dust from your feet. Freely you have received, freely give what you have been given. (Matthew 10:7:14; Mark 6:11; Acts 13:51)

(Matthew 10) is instructions to His apostles and to us.

Therefore whoever confesses Me before men, him I shall also confess before my Father in heaven. (Matthew 10:32-33; Luke 12:7; Revelation 3:5; 2 Timothy 2:12) “Do no think I came to bring peace on earth. I did not come to make peace but a sword. For I have come to set a man against his father, a daughter against her mother and a daughter-in-law against her mother in-law. (Matthew 10:34; Luke 12:49; Micah 7:6) A man’s foes will be those of his own household.’ (Psalm 41:9; John 13:18) He who loves father or mother more than Me is not worthy of Me. And he who loves a son or daughter more than Me is not worthy of Me. And he who does not take up his cross and follow me is not worthy of me.”

Do you feel this gift? It is a certain assurance that you belong to the Lord if you take your opportunities to do so to tell the world. It really doesn’t have to be elegant. Just do it. When you find a dead-end in your family, it is very hard. In going through my brother’s death there has been all kinds of clashes of spirit. I feel not able to say a word. Guess what though I still do. If someone’s heart is hardened by the Lord. It is in His time, that one should come to Him, or not. In my family, I find several fed so much that they can earn their way to heaven you can’t get them to hear anything. They always say I have my beliefs you have yours. Realize satan and his dark angels and his disciples do not want you to take out your bible and ask God with a surrendered heart to understand. These are the deceivers prophesied of. Always here and more to come. Their goal is to take as many to hell as they can. My hope in you reading this is for you to have the gift of mercy, He freely offers to all. Reject it or accept it. If you reject, you will not see heaven. If you are following the same life you’ve always had, you have not been given a new life in Jesus Christ. If this falls on dead ears, I pray for you and all those who cannot Believe in the Father, The Son, and the Holy Spirit…Put Him First in your life. That does not mean you have to leave your family. Although that may happen in some cases. They do not like the change in you because you belong to Christ Jesus!

Christ prayed for all believers in Him and all those who will believe in Me through their word. (John 18:20-26. Then they crucified Him an innocent man, a sinless man, according to the prophets for propitiation of our sins. (Isaiah 53:50)

Forgiveness is turning toward the Lord.

Yesterday was hard. I waited a long time to speak to my husband. I had sent Christian Valentine cards to them. I asked them through AIM if they received them. He said they did and he did not get one, no matter. I did send one though. He said he forgot to answer me a week ago. I was talking a bit about my brother. He said he hopes my brother does not suffer too much like his cousin did. I said I was there with you then. I cried with you over her. He said no one suffered like her. I said everyone suffers with cancer. Anyway I got offended when he said that. I told him you didn’t know my brother anyway. He said what has that to do with it.

I am sorry but, I felt his arrogance over the oceans. I told him that. He said he can’t help it. We got into discussing the past which he wants to forget. I reminded him that he needs to repent for all the times he incited my illness. You see us little bipolars get upset being made fun of or ignored like we don’t exist.  He did not love me anymore. He was ashamed of me. He said he will never ask forgiveness because he did nothing wrong. God knows what he did. I told him what God says about not repenting. I told him you will stand before Him one day and be judged. For you must forgive others and repent of your sins or you are lost forever in the lake of fire. I told him the frying pan. He said he will have a much better time down there. Anyway he will never admit he did anything to cause me to leave. I admit and repent I said things to get to him. I know he tramples the Lord Jesus under his feet. He won’t believe. That would mean coming to the light (Jesus) where his sins would be revealed. Even though I was very ill I knew. God knows. I was sick and how can I be responsible? Did I pretend I was and am sick? That I was out of my mind on purpose? For what I did not know I did? I know what I was told I did. After I was tormented. I cracked. Then I asked God, please don’t make me have to leave my family? Then I wanted to die.

These examples of trials that everyone shares make you stronger when you give them to the Lord. For remember He said to His apostles and to us after He told them about His upcoming death and resurrection. These truths are for us today and always…

“Theses things I have spoken to you, that in Me you may have peace. In the world you will have tribulation; but be of good cheer, I have overcome the world.” (John 16)

If we do not repent and obey the Lord we will spend eternity suffering apart from Him. You  will know when He returns that He is the living God as the bible tells us. From the Old Testament prophets to the apostles and disciples of the  New Testament. Don’t you even wonder why every one is stomping out the Lord. It is because they want to do what is right in their own eyes. They want no one to judge them. They want no one telling them of their sins. They want no one speaking of Jesus. The minute a person hears His name they get angry, defensive. Why? Because satan, wants you to continue on the wide path to destruction. Being a Christian is not easy. You want others to know the truth. You tell people about Christ and His sacrifice and about God and His mercy upon us, if we repent and forgive. He loves us as we should love others. If you have or are suffering in your life, turn to Jesus. He will make your burden lighter. Don’t you want to share that truth with others. Let them know Jesus through you as others know Him through us. Many will perish because they do not heed. Everyone in the earth, to ends of it, to every nation will have heard of Jesus crucified to save us. Taking our place for our sins. When that day comes where will you be? If you are not for Jesus, you are against Him. If you deny Him. He will deny you to the Father.

I can tell you that I am a Christian with a Christian brother who is dying. He is ready to go from here. He knows the Lord and what He wills is for this to be his time. He is faithful in his knowledge of the Lord’s promises. He will leave here and go to heaven. His name is in the Book of Life. Is yours? If not, you are in the other books with all your sins remaining to be judged. You did not believe in the only true God. Jesus Christ, God made Man, who suffered, died, was buried and arose on the third day. He ascended to the right hand of the Father. By His Holy Spirit only will you know that truth, when He has mercy on your soul.

My husbands last words to me were. I want my wife, not you.  So there is my answer. Too much pain, too much wasted time, too much time away from the most important person in my life. My Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. He is our comforter. His love through us that reaches out to others. Saying you can come to Him. He will be your Savior and His helper, the Holy Spirit will be with you through your trials. He went away to prepare a place for us. And He will come again to receive us to Him. He promised and Christians believe. Do you? (John 14)

Does your life belong to Christ?

I made it back yesterday to my brother’s. I plan on staying as much as possible. My other brother is also here. We are getting along fine. My mom did not want me to come but, I am honoring my brother’s request. He wants two here at a time. I brought him “The Gospel According to Matthew.” It’s word for word. As of yet I am not sure he wants to see it. He says he’s good with God. I was hoping he would say yes, for maybe my other brother will watch with us. I have Acts also. I should have bought my own on DVDs. Instead I have VHS and we would have to hook it up. Maybe I’ll see if I can buy it somewhere here. My friends and I had prayer about it all before I left. We prayed for the Lord’s will. He will be talking, not us. I do recommend these to you, plus the book was excellent on the actor, Bruce Marchiano, who portrayed Christ. You never know what goes on behind the scenes and what God works out to His honor.

I hadn’t been to my own church in about three weeks. I was glad for the support. I saw Pastor and they will be emailing encouragement to my brother. Things really do happen in a row. We lost dad to pancreatic cancer 3-16-2012. My uncle 11-7-2013 to heart failure. My brother when the Lord calls. He is stage four with pancreatic cancer also. He is still trying to work from home when he feels good enough. I think he is amazing. He cares for his company so much. He wants them to be over changes being done before he dies. He is a lone computer guy in his area and no one knows his job. Who saw this coming? It’s not about him, no selfishness, just giving all he can.

He still has a pump draining bile, no let up yet. He is eating better not gaining or losing more, at this point. Lord, I Love him so much. He said yesterday he wants to see his whole family in heaven. We know we are going as born-again Christians. My other brother is not awakened. He kind of heeds what I say about the world at times. New world order stuff, disasters becoming more and more frequent. He says no way he would go for that one world order thing. If you don’t have Jesus, God, The Holy Spirit as your Savior, your eyes could be blinded and you will follow to the last day. Then you will realize who you denied and did not obey and repent your sins to, Jesus Christ, God made man who came in the world to save us. He promised in His word. He will come back to judge us according to our sins. (Revelation 20:11:15) If you believe??? Yours sins are covered by His blood shed on the cross. (Romans 3:25; Hebrews 2:17; 1 John 2:2; 1 John 4:10) He came to earth, born of a virgin by the Holy Spirit. (Matthew 1:23)

He was persecuted by His own because they thought their religion was supreme. They fasted, they gave to the poor supposedly, were holy, but inside they were full of dead man’s bones. (Matthew 23:27)

This life is not about you. It is about being His son or daughter, adopted into His family, His kingdom forever. You can know that with all your heart, all your soul, all your strength and all your mind. You cannot be snatched out of His hands. (John 10:28) He is The Good Shepherd. We are His sheep and we hear His voice and we follow Him. If you don’t hear His voice, you can be sure your life does not belong to Him. (John 10:11-18) Nevertheless, you will lose your life anyway. (Matthew 16:25)

Who do you belong to eternally?

And there are also so many other things that Jesus did, which if they were written one by one, I suppose that even the world itself could not contain the books that would be written. Amen. (John 21:24-25)

I am terminal and accept it.

Yesterday were my twin brother’s birthdays. This will be the last for my one brother. We talked about the Lord yesterday. He says he is ready. The fluids have not stopped flowing. It is bile from the surgery coming out the gallbladder area. The doctor says we will give it a couple more weeks. He wants him down to fifty before he can take out the tube. He may need another endoscopy to put in a bigger stint. You see when they did the surgery they thought it would be successful. So the stint is still small. I don’t know if he will even do that.

Last night mom and I said the word, terminal. I think he was hoping he was getting better. One of his friends is still trying to get him to go to Arizona for treatment. He is too weak. His nurse told my mom a doctor went there and it did not help him. His wife will be left to get a job after all the expense. He checked another place in Texas and was told the best chance was the whipple surgery. He told me he will probably be angry and accepting at times. He still had hope he was getting better. He admitted looking in the mirror he is not. I see the suffering at times with extreme pain. It is almost time to go on hospice. They will maintain the pain, keep him comfortable. I am glad he will live life to the fullest until that time, which he is doing. I have asked the Lord for a miracle according to His will. He already answered about the pain because he does have meds to control it right now. He is now adhering to a low-fat diet. When he eats the wrong thing with too much fat, it gets very bad. So he is no longer going to test that. He has lost forty pounds since September. 

There is the sting of death coming upon him. His soul will go directly to the Lord, as we are promised as believers. When he comes to our house for hospice, which I am very glad will his be choice. I would think he would want a believer with him constantly. I believe it is worked out by the Lord. I was to my dad. I have and will be for others. It is again nothing to do with me the Lord always leads me.

Everyone of us will feel that sting of death. You don’t know when it may be coming. That is why you must turn to Him. He is the Savior of the world, Jesus Christ, the only begotten Son of the Father, God incarnate. If you ask you will not be denied. Only because He gives you the mercy we all receive in repentance of our sins. He adds to His church daily. He will raise us up on that last day. Believers like my brother whose body will be asleep in the Lord. Second the generation alive at that time will follow in a twinkle of an eye. Our souls live on for eternity. I know it will be just a moment in God’s time before I see my brother again, besides all the saints saved over the centuries. Before life ever began, He knew us. He knew who would turn to Him in brokenness. I praise and worship Jesus Christ, as my Savior. He is the Savior of the world. The I am. He is the same past, present and future. He never changes. Are you one of those chosen to have His mercy, grace through faith? Are you a son or daughter of the Lord, forever? I don’t know that or begin to know. All I know is everyone either rejects or accepts  Him. You will be held accountable for your choice. We are all created to worship. He says so in His word, the Bible. Seek Him and He will be found. Ask and the door shall be opened to you. He is waiting for those who belong to Him. All the Father has drawn to Jesus will be saved. He will not lose one. Face death knowing where you are going. Because you can be assured of that by acceptance. His helper will come to you, the Holy Spirit will sustain you and preserve you until that last day. No one but the Father knows that day. If you die without knowing Him, you are condemned already. I could look all these promises up for you, but if you reject Him, it will be all foolishness to you. The Lord knows all of us and our hearts. Does he know yours? Yes, is the answer. Seek Him today all you broken-hearted for He is there.

Verily, verily, “I say to you unless one is born again he will not see the kingdom of God.” (John 3:3) Will you see it?

Knowing the Lord is our strength.

Regardless of what we face, He is always there for us to turn to. In grief, in joy, whatever the trial. We must forgive ourselves and repent and ask forgiveness. That is because sin is still in us. I know I have shed many tears lately. I know He hears my prayers. I pray always according to His will.

We are with my brother and that is His grace upon our family. I took a leave from my job. I am able to do God’s work in this time of trial. That is what matters to me. I don’t have to go back home. I can stay and be with him.

He was transferred back to Harper in Detroit last night. He had edema in his legs. They believe he has a problem at the site of the gallbladder removal during his attempted whipple procedure. We are not completely sure yet. I see a big change in his spirit and faith. I am very happy to see that. I heard him say it doesn’t matter if the Lord takes him. He knows where he is going.

This wonderful blogger added to my strength today with His God inspired words.


Praise the Lord in everything.

Update they drained the fluid. He is more comfortable. The surgeon will be in Monday to reaccess.